Divorce support

For some reason our society often puts the greatest pressure on us when we are at our most vulnerable. This is the case when relationships end. We have to be at our most business like, thinking calmly out into the future, just when our emotions are all over the place. When that future seems a million miles away and we …

The secret to a long lasting relationship

Close your eyes and imagine yourself walking up to the self help section of your local bookshop. My guess is that you’re looking at a vast number of titles claiming to have discovered the secret to the perfect relationship, and of course unlimited wealth and happiness, etc. In my practice as a Wimbledon couples counsellor I meet with people hoping I …

Tinder and . . .

Recently the Telegraph and now Vanity Fair launched a serious critique of what the ‘Tinder’ generation means for us. They were asking if we have lost the ability to manage medium and longterm meaningful relationships? Have we lost skills such that we shouldn’t expect relationships to last “till death do us part” anymore? As a Wimbledon couple counsellor I come …

How do I stay ‘changed’?

This is about post treatment maintenance. I keep finding that my ex business world thinking pops up in my work as a Wimbledon couples therapist. I want to know how therapy works, why it works and here I want to look at how to ensure it stays working after our therapy. Essentially how do we all get the best from …

Working abroad – Expatriate experiences

Here is how it goes. Mum or Dad comes home from work all excited and says, “They want me to move to New York… Dubai, Shanghai,” etc., etc. Its exciting, there is a relocation package and often a considerable rise in living standards. This wave of enthusiasm carries us through the challenge of picking new schools, houses, packing and travel …

Should therapy be free?

Mmmmm. Tricky one. Lets start with reasons supporting yes: Well life shouldn’t be like that, it’s not my fault my boss is a tyrant, my partner seems to lack the empathy gene and my son still wets the bed. These all suggest that yes, having to pay to deal with what is not your fault is unreasonable. Therapy is also …

‘Job done’

This is an  interesting phrase, perhaps suggesting that life is about getting on with things, getting through tick lists and getting jobs ‘done’. Many would be shocked to consider therapy as a ‘job done’ tick list contender. And perhaps there are those prospective clients who fear that many of us therapists would feel insulted if our contribution was just a …

Does therapy work?

Good question. You may be thinking of spending a significant sum with a therapist to deal with something, and yet no one will tell you clearly if it will work or not. And your not alone in being concerned if therapy can really help. US research shows that 76% of those considering therapy cite lack of confidence in outcome as …